I will start this post off by saying that I am in no way, shape, or form an expert on any particular subject.
I am a woman, living in a society that many of us are aware values our appearances above everything else. And with that, let us begin.
How much time do we spend on the internet, surfing the web, ignoring the advertisements that pop up on the side of the page or interrupt our YouTube videos? How close do you pay attention to the commercials that play background noise to your homework or snacking? Do those billboards really do anything to convince you to pay for whatever business is slathered across it?
Most of you will defend yourselves; "I just zone out the commercials, I don't really pay much attention, I can think for myself."
Sure, a McDonald's ad isn't going to prop you right then and there to get up and drive to the nearest Micky D's to get a Big Mac. We pride ourselves on our ability to think for ourselves and filter through the information fed to us to determine what is valuable, what's bullshit, and anything other category.
But how many times do you see a Victoria's Secret ad and catch yourself staring at their bodies, their impossibly long legs, flat stomachs, perfectly puckered lips? They sell clothing, lingerie, bathing suits, yet we are more focused on the bodies and the models showing them off. Because what these ads are really showing us is what's important, what really matters.
And 99% of the time, what matters is how we look, how skinny we are.
This is supposed to determine our worth in our society.
So how can we be surprised when we hear that 1 out of every 4 girls has an eating disorder, when all we see are young, thin, impossibly "beautiful" women, and we're told in order to be happy, in order to be accepted by others (or to be available for a relationship) we must look like them. We are told that it is OUR FAULTS if we don't look like them.
Oh, anyone can do it, you just have to work hard enough, pay enough money for breast implants and brand name clothes, eat only this amount.
When is it enough? When does it stop?
Be aware; only 5% of the population have the body type required to be professional models; long legged, wide-shoulders, narrow waist and hips, and that is GENETIC. And you know what, they are perfectly beautiful the way they are as well, but you cannot change these parts about yourself anymore than you can make yourself shorter or taller. All of those teeny, tiny waisted women with large breasts? Implants. Impossible curves? Photoshop.
If you still think media is an appropriate representation of the world around us, pay attention to commercials and the ads in your magazines.
How many older women do you see portrayed?
How many real-life situations do you see women in, ones that you could relate to in an every-day way?
How many black women, asian women, latina women, do you see represented there, and then how many do you see IN THE WORLD AROUND US?
The fact is, the media world is dominantly white, heterosexual, upper class, and young. The more you know that their representation is false, the more you can distance yourself from it, and the more you can begin to focus on your OWN identity, and less of the identity our society would like to mold for you.
Also, please keep in mind, not only is it the KIND of women that the media is presenting us with, but it is HOW they are presenting them to us. Female athletes; do you see them covered in sweat, huddled with their team or clutching their trophy still in uniform? Or do you find them half-naked, posed in sexually exploitative ways, off the court (could you even tell they are an athlete, had they not been labeled, or just as another model?), with children or husbands (because women are really just caregivers, being an athlete is just a side hobby)? Be especially careful of looking at these pictures for inspiration; are you admiring her athletic achievements, her athletic ability and strength? Or are you admiring her body and the way that men would react to seeing a body like that? Sexual exploitation and portraying women in these ways, as sexual objects, or super thin, frail models, are all ways to keep women in their place and from gaining power. You should be vulnerable, weak, silent, passive, and attractive to men.
Whatever happened to being strong, ambitious, authoritative, and doing this for yourself?
In a world that relies heavily now on digital remaking of pictures and touch-ups, be skeptical of every picture you see. Remind yourself; chances are, she is not real. No one is flawless; if they were, how would they be different from anyone else who achieved this idea of "perfection?"
If you still think this doesn't apply to you, think about what you do every day. Instagram? Why do we need filters of ourselves to show to the world? Why do so many girls feel the need to alter their own pictures before publicizing them? Because we are so programmed that we are not good enough, pretty enough, thin enough, that there is always something better, and this can be so incredibly destructive that happiness just seems another pound away, another dress size lower.
If you believe that weight loss or slimming down your jean size is going to bring happiness with your body, it won't. You must learn to love your body before starting a journey with it; would you go on a roadtrip with someone you didn't like expecting to love them by the end? No. Everyone has flaws, everyone has little quirks. Maybe your thighs touch, but your legs are the strongest part of your body. Maybe your arms jiggle; if you shake something, it's going to move, that's just natural. You are different from that girl beside you and from the one behind her, and you know what? That's okay. That's beautiful. You are in every way exceptional and different from someone else. Rejoice in the fact that you are you, and no one else can possibly take that from you.
This is by no means a "cure-all" for our society, or the sexist problems within it. However, awareness, critical analysis, and constant questioning of what is being presented to us can help detach us from the stereotypes reinforced on the television screen and in magazines and elsewhere. Talk to your friends about it, talk to your parents, your professors and teachers. The more discussion, the better.
If you or a friend is suffering from an eating disorder, please do not take it lightly. It is not a trivial disorder, and it is not fashionable or trendy. Millions of people suffer from eating disorders, and 20% of those people who do not receive help will die because of their disorder. Please, helping someone (or even yourself) can save a life.
Eating Disorder Help
ED Recovery
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